Ever had a meltdown on your yoga mat? I have. A number of times. Just a few weeks back was the most recent. In class. A number of things conspired to have me feeling very fragile – a couple of nights out celebrating with not enough sleep or good food and too much wine, then a close friend rang with the news she’d lost a loved one. A recipe for disaster. I’d been avoiding my mat at home, telling myself I was fine, but in reality, just dodging the fallout. On my way to class I felt the inevitability of the impending meltdown and wondered if I should just turn the car around and climb back into bed. But no, I needed the yoga. However there’s no hiding from your stuff on your mat.
Child’s pose was my undoing, and there it was. Tears, snot, the whole shebang. Messy. Awkward. But also, not. If ever there was a safe place to lose your sh*t, it’s your yoga mat. In a space which is non-judgemental, with people who don’t criticize. You might not know these folk very well but you may have seen them regularly over a long period of time – for me, weekly, over a couple of years. These fellow yogi’s, including the teacher, have become almost a yoga-family. They’ve seen me at 6am with bed hair and my sleepy face on or having brushed hair and teeth and looking more awake, but always with no pretension. No mask. No armour against the world. The true me. On that morning, the true me was fragile and emotional. All there was in response was concern and acceptance. There was no need to be embarrassed or ashamed. Yogi’s know the power of a yoga practice and the strength it gives to allow you to face your true self.
So, what happened next? Well, I wiped my tears, washed my face and got back on my mat. After that somewhat dramatic release of a whole lot of pent-up emotion I had the most amazing yoga practice. I felt calm, soft, warm and open. The yoga had once again worked its magic.
Ahhh, yoga. It certainly took me to pieces that day, but it sure as hell put me back together again.
whitelilyyoga 